(805) 244-8489
Therapy for Daughters of Emotionally Unavailable Mothers
Heal the patterns you inherited and create emotionally safe relationships in your own family.
You love your children deeply
But sometimes your reactions surprise you.
A sharp tone you didn't intend.
A wave of overwhelm during conflict.
A feeling of shutting down when emotions run high.
Why did that moment feel so strong?
Later you may find yourself wondering...
Why did that moment feel so intense?
Many women who find their way to my practice carry a quiet pain:
They fear repeating the same emotional patterns they experienced growing up.
If you were raised by an emotionally unavailable mother, these reactions are not unusual.
The emotional patterns we learned in childhood often continue shaping how we mother, experience relationships, boundaries, and conflicts as adults.
Therapy can help you understand those patterns and begin creating something different for the next generation.
When Early Relationships Shape Adult Life
Growing up with an emotionally unavailable mother often leaves a subtle but powerful imprint on how relationships feel.
Many women notice patterns such as:
Feeling responsible for everyone's emotions
Becoming overwhelmed during conflict
Struggling with guilt when setting boundaries
Overthinking interactions with loved ones or at work
Worrying about repeating the same emotional patterns with their own children.
These responses are not personal flaws.
They are emotional survival strategies formed in early relationships.
With thoughtful therapeutic work, the patterns can evolve.
Therapy That Goes Beneath the Surface
Many clients initially come to therapy hoping to reduce anxiety, depression, emotional overwhelm, or relationship tension.
But what they often discover is something deeper.
Therapy offers an opportunity to understand the emotional blueprint shaped in early relationships and begin developing new ways of responding to life's challenges.
Overtime, these women begin to experience:
Greater emotional steadiness during difficult moments
Clearer boundaries and communication
Calmer interactions with their children
Stronger self-trust in relationships
Relief from long-standing shame or self-doubt
The goal is not perfection.
The goal is freedom fromm patterns that no longer serve you.
Meet Amelia
Amelia Mora Mars, LMFT
Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist
Ketamine Assisted Psychotherapist
Board Chair, Childhood Matters
Mom of 10
I specialize in working with daughters of emotionally unavailable mothers who want to understand the deeper roots of their emotional patterns and build healthier relationships in their own families.
My interest in this work began long before I became a therapist.
I never had the opportunity to meet my Abuelita. I came to know her through the stories passed down in my family, stories of the pain she carried and the fear her children sometimes felt around her.
As I grew older, I became curious about how emotional wounds can quietly move through generations, shaping how love, safety, and connection are experienced within a family.
Those early reflections stayed with me.
They eventually led me to study the ways attachment, trauma, and family relationships influence emotional patterns across generations.
Today, I help women understand how the emotional dynamics they experienced growing up continue to influence their relationships as adults, and how those patterns can change.
When this work begins to take hold, clients experience something they have been longing for:
A deeper sense of emotional steadiness, clarity, and safety in their relationships.
My Approach
Therapy unfolds in several phases:
Understanding the Pattern
We explore how early attachment experiences shaped emotional responses and relationship dynamics.
Building Emotional Stability
Clients develop stronger emotinal regulation and begin responding to difficult moments with greater calm and clarity.
Creating New Relationship Patterns
Over time, clients begin interacting differently with partners, children, and family members and feel more grounded in their relationships.
Ketamine Assisted Psychotherapy
When Talk Therapy & Medication Isn’t Enough—KAP Meets You Where You Are
For some clients, the emotional patterns formed in early relationships can be difficult to shift through traditional talk therapy alone.
Ketamine-assisted psychotherapy can support the therapeutic process by creating a temporary window of increased neuroplasticity, allowing the brain to form new emotional pathways and perspectives.
While my practice specializes in working with women, ketamine-assisted psychotherapy is available for both men and women and couples who are seeking deeper therapeutic work.
My work integrates ketamine therapy through a structured approach called The Ketamine Layering Effect™.
Rather than treating ketamine as a single breakthrough experience, this method intentionally builds change over time. Research and clinical practice suggest that a series of six sessions is often considered the gold standard, as each experience helps reinforce new neural pathways and emotional insights.
Each layer builds on the previous one so that insights from the experience translate into lasting emotional change rather than temporary breakthroughs.
Preparation sessions to clarify intentions and emotional themes
Ketamine-assisted experiences conducted in a safe, supportive setting
Integration sessions to translate insights into meaning into meaningful life changes
By combining the neuroplastic effects of ketamine with thoughtful integration, clients are often able to access and reshape patterns that have felt stuck for years.
Ketamine-assited psychotherapy for men, women, and couples
Services
Ketamine Therapy
Therapy for Women
Therapy for Moms
Faith-Based Therapy
Pre-Marital Counseling
Client Experiences
"I have found joy in living, which I still consider unreal sometimes."
I was severely depressed and chronically anxious. I tried a variety of alternatives, and I didn’t seem to be able to get out of the desperate state of trauma and sadness that I was in. I felt at the end of my rope. After a decade of suffering with several mental health issues, I feel now I can handle the ups and downs of life without the extreme reaction that I used to have.
It makes a huge difference to have a therapist like Amelia, who understands trauma and is compassionate and knowledgeable about this new and rewarding treatment.
I have found joy in living, which I still consider unreal sometimes.
LS, Travel Writer
Blogs
Healing the Hurt Beneath the Anger | Amelia Mora Mars, LMFT
When Anger Wasn’t Allowed: Healing the Hurt Beneath the Anger
As a little girl, I remember feeling so angry at my mom, at the things she said, the way she acted, and how small she sometimes made me feel. But underneath all that anger was something much softer: hurt. It hurts to fear your own mother. It hurts to not trust the person who’s supposed to make you feel safe.
When I showed anger on my face, my mom would say, “Go look in the mirror and see how ugly you are.” I can still remember the sting of those words. I didn’t know it then, but what she really taught me was that anger was bad, that it made me unlovable. So I learned to hide it. I swallowed my feelings, smiled when I wanted to cry, and tried to be the “good girl.”
But here’s the thing: anger isn’t the real problem. It’s a signal. It’s what we see on the surface, but underneath it lives hurt, fear, and disappointment. Anger is often our body’s way of saying, “Something doesn’t feel right. Please pay attention.”
When we grow up in homes where emotions aren’t welcomed, we learn to disconnect from them, especially anger. We either explode or go numb. Neither feels good, and both leave us misunderstood.
It’s taken me years to see anger in a different light. Now I understand that it isn’t something to fear or be ashamed of. Anger can protect. It can help us set boundaries. It can even lead to healing if we listen to what’s beneath it.
For me, healing meant giving that little girl a voice again, the one who was told her feelings made her ugly. She wasn’t ugly. She was hurt, scared, and longing to be understood.
If you grew up feeling misunderstood, too, I see you. Maybe you were told to calm down, stop being dramatic, or get over it. Maybe, like me, you learned that certain emotions weren’t safe to show.
But here’s what I’ve learned: anger doesn’t make us bad; it makes us human. And when we learn to listen to it with compassion, it becomes a doorway, not to destruction, but to truth, healing, and connection.
A Gentle Invitation
In therapy, and especially in ketamine-assisted psychotherapy, we can begin to safely explore the emotions we’ve spent years pushing away. When we create space for what lies beneath the anger, something powerful happens: we find understanding instead of shame, compassion instead of judgment, and peace instead of pain.
If you’re ready to start healing the emotions that have felt too heavy to carry alone, I’d be honored to walk with you. Together, we can uncover what your anger has been trying to tell you all along and help you finally feel free.
I'm just a call away at (805) 244-8489.
Our partners
In-network with Gold Coast Health Plan and Optum for talk therapy
2660 Townsgate, Suite 450, Westlake Village CA 91361
(805) 244-8489
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